2013 in Retrospect - The Year of Mom

Needless to say, this was a difficult year. For me and for Mom.

Mom this year

Around the last week of April, Mom asked me to drive her to the ER at Alameda Hospital. She was having chest pains and shortness of breath. I asked if she wanted me to call the ambulance instead, she said no. She didn't come back home until the end of August....

The first week of May, she had a triple bypass and she had to start dialysis after the surgery. She was transferred to a skilled nursing facility, where she got an infection, which affected her brain. She was confused and hallucinating, so she had to go back to the hospital. The hallucinations continued for about three weeks, then it just stopped and she was discharged after a few days to a different nursing facility, where she stayed for two months.

We continued to have problems with her thigh wounds (where they took the grafts) not healing properly for a few more months, so we had to continue to see a wound doctor. She continues to go to the dialysis center three times a week, but her port (where they attach the machine) is still at her chest, where it is riskier because it goes directly to her heart. However, they cannot move it because she has a pacemaker and her arm veins are too small.

She moves around on her own just fine. She uses a walker when she's outside the house.

Lea this year

Most of the year was very very difficult, in terms of finances and time and personal well-being. I had no health insurance; I was working long hours as a freelance editor, earning about minimum wage; I had no privacy because we were living in a one-bedroom apartment. At the same time, I was working on other projects that I thought might bring in some cash, and I was searching for a more permanent job. I had little money and even less time to do what I needed to take care of myself.

My ego certainly took a beating in so many ways; it had been so many decades since I had been rejected, turned down, and demeaned so many times. In that sense, maybe it was a good experience in learning humility without losing my dignity.

But all that changed on November 12.

On November 12, we found out that a two-bedroom apartment opened up in the same apartment complex (which Mom didn't want to leave the complex), and we were the first in line for it. That evening, I got a voicemail from a recruiter that they wanted to give me an offer.

So, just before Thanksgiving, we moved to the new apartment. And, on December 2, I started a new contract position as a content developer / technical writer.

With the overhead of having a regular job (commute, preparing work clothes that are not pajamas, and preparing lunches for the week), I have even less personal time, but, at least, I'm above the poverty line again.

Other highlights of the year

• Nov 4-6: Ninang Rosie (my godmother), Uncle Pol, and Auntie Bei visited from Ontario, Canada, and they brought along Auntie Saling from LA.
• Dec 26-28: Virginia visited on her way to Greece (to pick up a temporary passport) for a two-month stay with her sister and her 95yo mom whose health is failing.